Giving thanks

It is the night before Thanksgiving and I am beginning to feel a little sad. I suppose it's natural--Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday not because I love turkey (but it helps) but because to me it has always been about the intentional sharing of time, breaking bread with people I care about. A chance to simply gather and be present to the people we love and be mindful of all of our wonderful gifts. Being away from home, I knew, would be tough on Thanksgiving, but I think I might be underestimating it if I feel it already today.

But even in that there is so much to be thankful for and to continue to be cognizant of.

I spent the last two evenings at Verbum Dei taking part in homeless awareness week. Campus Ministry organized a sleepout in solidarity and a number of students, as well as faculty and staff, slept out through the night with nothing but cardboard and sleeping bags on Verb's campus. It was a very enlightening experience, not so much for what I got out of it through sleeping outside (it wasn't that hard for me...I swear it's colder in  my house than it was these last two fairly mild nights--mid-50s isn't all that cold, as I'm sure all you eastcoasters will agree) but more because of what the students learned from it. I honestly didn't feel like there was all that much to the experience--yes we slept outdoors but before that they were playing on the computer, or messing around, or doing homework. But, I think the speakers we had struck them.

I am also trying to keep in mind how much more homelessness is part of their lives--the area they live in, the neighborhood Verbum Dei is located, are full of people without homes. And I was especially struck by how much they seemed to grow in understanding, and even that they were willing to take part in this week, given how exposed to it they are on such a common basis. I think at that age it would be a lot easier to just be creeped out or annoyed by it. But they went out of their way to try and understand those circumstances, which I think is incredibly cool and inspiring.

The boys reacted a lot to what we did and had great things to say in discussion--a lot of them recognized the difficult and diverse factors that could cause someone to become homeless. And if they didn't before a lot of them began to learn and change their perspective.

Some common themes: being thankful for what we have, changing the conversation about homelessness (not demeaning them with names, encouraging others to rethink their stereotypes), giving them attention in some way, even small ones, like a smile or a short exchange if not a full blown conversation, and simply not making snap judgments about how they got into that situation. Many of them had never considered how many possible ways or reasons there are for homelessness: natural disaster, domestic violence, mental illness, the general poor nature of the economy and job market, lack of affordable housing and so with all of those possible reasons many for the first time realized that it isn't necessarily a person's bad choices that leads them to the streets.

Many of the boys admitted to having certain assumptions--if not laziness, then drug abuse or even some kind of enjoyment out of being without a home--but through our speakers, a woman who was formerly homeless (who sadly, I missed), one of the boys' fathers who works at LAMP (a local shelter) and the discussions and experiences of other students and some of the staff, they started to see that many assumptions are simply stereotypes and are harmful.

One of the guys on the last night of reflection briefly shared his experience with homelessness; when he was in eighth grade his mother fled an abusive husband in the middle of the night. They spent several months at family's homes and traveling around in different places. He struggled with depression and weight gain, but luckily in the end they were able to get back onto their feet. His household still struggles a great deal with money, but he said he grew a great deal from the experience. And he's a smart kid, one of the top in the class. He has dreams of traveling to the east coast, specifically Washington DC and I think he can get just about anywhere he wants to go.

Another student shared a story about simply sharing a meal with a man who often sat outside of a Chinese restaurant he frequents.

The way these boys showed their openness to growth, their desire to learn, and a level of awareness of the great things in their life really inspired me. I was inspired even more by the stories the two aforementioned students shared.

There isn't a better time to do an event like this than Thanksgiving, when we take time out of our busy lives to assess and profess the blessings in our lives, and all of these events made me incredibly thankful to be here in LA this year.

I am thankful for this opportunity to take part in JVC. That I can voluntarily take a year out of my life and choose to live this way. That I have been granted a chance to share in the experience of these boys as they grow into men, and see through their eyes a world that I could never have experienced because of who I am. I am thankful for my housemates and extended community in LA who have provided me laughs and support these three months. I am thankful for my family for supporting me and loving me throughout my life. For being there for me to cry with. For taking care of me when I was ill so I could grow into who I am today. For a roof over my head. For having so many possible opportunities for next year and beyond.  I am thankful for Sara. For reminding me that I am a person worth investing in. For listening and accepting all of my insecurities, doubts, and imperfections. For being willing to go through the strain of a long distance relationship. For eight fantastic months. I am thankful for yet another year of continued health. I am thankful for all of my friends at home, from Cabrini. Though I have done an incredibly poor job of keeping in touch, you have all, each of you reading this, been amazing, beautiful, fantastic parts of my life, helped contribute positively to forming me into who I am, and I cannot convey enough how glad I am to have met so many amazing people! I am thankful for my education, and the fact that applying to college was so easy for me. I am thankful for today. I am thankful that I won't wake up tomorrow wondering what I might eat or where I might have to sleep.

I am thankful. So thankful.  Life is beautiful.