Further Simple Living

We had our first casa discussion on simple living--while we did not make any concrete decisions, it was the first time we truly talked about it as a community. Our program coordinator Glenn is staying with us  for a week--as a support, a checkup, etc, after the first two months. He read us a brief passage and gave us a list of questions about simple living to reflect on. This is what I wrote.

What Glenn read us tonight brings a new thought about simple living, a moment of clairvoyance or connection for me, if you will--the distillation of things to be more grateful of our gifts. The true gifts: our life, our opportunities, health. This moment. This day. This, I did not realize is what speaks to me most about simple living-- the joy I found in my service immersion experiences, traveling to these places where each average, every day gift we take advantage of is something to cherish was the greatest gift of those weeks. It is how I've tried to live my life since the morning I awoke from my surgery and the pain that had been constant for ten, twelve years was gone. Every day I remember that pain, the exhaustion Crohn's brought me and every day these last four years has been a gift. I have been so thankful for the new life of energy and joy I have discovered these last few years. New friends, new experiences; new life every day.

From simple living I hope to examine the depths of those gifts more deeply. Where joy lies beyond the every day conveniences we rely on--soft clothes from the dryer, long, hot showers, clean dishes in minutes. To find joy in my lifelong circumstance perhaps in contrast to the boys at Verb or the people without homes on Skid Row.

My life has been an inward one due to illness for so long and so my hobbies involve collection and consumption. Collecting comic books, DVDs, toys, video games. Where is the true joy in my life, where have I found it beyond these things which are fun, at times inspiring, but in the end, unnecessary. I want to examine my place, my gifts, and learn more deeply all there is to be thankful for.

Joy without money. Life without consumption.

Perhaps a better world in the end. If we all lived more simply, would jealousy end? Could conflict be forgotten? Simple living to be a better citizen, friend, neighbor, boyfriend, son. To be open in my heart to relationships on a personal level, a global level, and then maybe I could make a difference--if only one time. If only for one person.

Before this year I thought often about how I would save for things I wanted this year. Things down the line. A couple action figures, some movies. But this year already I am feeling the freedom from that desire for constant consumption, my completionist and collection oriented mind. It is October 11 and I have spent only $5. And that was on a Subway sandwich. I don't feel the compulsion for these things like I did before this year began. Simple living is freeing--a  liberation from the consumerism of our daily life, a countercultural space to defy the values of our society. I have no desire to spend my money or stipend at this moment on anything beyond maybe food, maybe for some sightseeing or during my visits to Sara. But on frivolous things for the sake of a collection? The itch is subsiding, but not completely absent. It is a value I can see carrying on beyond this year.

I sometimes struggle with the why behind some of the things I've chosen to do for simple living--hanging clothes to dry, turning off lights behind me, using less water. But this year is a place to explore the impact of my decisions, perhaps if only as an act of understanding my place in comparison to others. This year is perhaps above anything else a year of exploration and learning. And the lessons are ongoing.